For those still sad over the end of Classic Joke Monday... there's nothing to be done. On another note, Ellen has an exciting new segment to tell you about!

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Jill Bell
551 days ago

Why don't monkey play cards in the jungle?? Because there are too many Cheetah's.

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Matt Scheel
551 days ago

What do you call a man in a pile of leaves? Russel
What do you call a man with a shovel? Doug
What do you call a man without a shovel? Dougless
What do you call a woman in the middle of a tennis court. Annette
What do you call a woman laying on the beach? Sandy
What do you call a man in the middle of the ocean with no arms and no legs? Bob
What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Eileen

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Matt Scheel
551 days ago

A blonde walks into a bar...... Ouch!!

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Matt Scheel
551 days ago

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree??

Wave

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Matt Scheel
551 days ago

What did the peanut say when he walked into the police station?

Ive been assaulted (a salted)

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Matt Scheel
551 days ago

Why did the orange roll down the hill?

Coz it ran out of juice

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Matt Scheel
551 days ago

What do you call a giant tree?

Treemendous

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Matt Scheel
551 days ago

I know you are coming to Australia soon so here's an Aussie joke for you: What do you get when you cross a sheep and a kangaroo??

A wooly jumper!!

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Matt Scheel
551 days ago

What did the male slice of bread say to his girlfriend slice of bread?

Im going to crumb im going to crumb!!

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MICHELE TOSIELLO
552 days ago

I HAVE A CLASSIC JOKE FOR YOU. WHERE DID THE ELEPHANT GO TO COOKING SCHOOL? TUSKANY!!!!!!!!!!

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Georgia Freeman
559 days ago

For Classic Joke Tuesday:

How do eskimos have babies? They rub their noses together till the little boogers fall out.

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roxanne
591 days ago

for classic joke tuesday:

Why was 5 afraid of 6? Because 7 8 9... (7 ate 9)

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Michael Fisher
598 days ago

Why is getting up at 4:30am like a pig's tail?
It's twirly.

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Lorna Kilborn
599 days ago

FOR CLASSIC JOKE TUESDAY!!

I called the Sheriff's office to report that I had found a suitcase in the woods with a fox and 3 cubs inside. The dispatcher said, "OH! How awful! Are they moving?" I replied, "To be honest I really don't know but it WOULD explain the suitcase." harhar!!

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Jessica
605 days ago

What goes "oh, oh, oh"?
--Santa walking backwards :)

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