Ellen has a new weekly tradition called "Classic Joke Wednesday," and her fans are really into it! We've been getting submissions from EllenTV.com, Twitter, and Facebook! Check out the best of Classic Joke Wednesday!

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Juliette Bonenfant
52 days ago

What did the mother cow say to the baby cow "It's pasture bedtime"

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Ann Hernandez
70 days ago

This is not a comment I can't say anything but good thing about Ellen, love watching her.

I have a job for Classic Wednesday

What did the fish say when he hits a wall answer Dam


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Mysti Alvarado
72 days ago

classic joke for you

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Brenda Sheftall
74 days ago

JOKE FOR ELLEN: what did the mama cow say to the baby cow? It's pasture bedtime. (Get it?)

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Cheryl Zolmer
76 days ago

How did the mushroom describe himself on his dating site profile? "I'm a Fun guy" ( fungi ) ...ha ha ha hilarious ! ;D

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87 days ago

Hey Ellen, Why don't Lions & Tigers eat Clowns, Cause they taste funny.

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Susan Ablack
96 days ago

How do you tell if you have an elephant in your refridgerator?
You find his footprints in the butter.

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Della Pavey
99 days ago

Ellen here's one of my husbands goofy jokes I thought might be good for your classic jokes: did you hear about the Indian that drown? (No how did he drown?)

He drown in his own tee"pee"

Love you girl! You are the best at lifting my mood on a bad day!

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Heidi Redmond
101 days ago

How do you catch a polar bear? cut a hole in the ice, put pea's around the hole and when the bear stops to take a pee you kick him in the Ice hole.

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104 days ago

Ellen, I am a laughaholic, Everyday at 4pm, I get a fix. Thanx, Girl, keep'em coming. Luv ya

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108 days ago

How do you call a guy that is cute, faithful and who will fight for you? A Pokemon

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108 days ago

How do you call a guy who is cute, faithful and who will fight for you? A Pokemon.

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Freya Zemek
118 days ago

An Aussie joke: What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with a sheep?
A wooly jumper.

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Kathryn Lester
133 days ago

Two jokes that I absolutely loved (and drove my family bonkers with retelling constantly) are:

What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A Yamahahaha

What do you call a frog that's illegally parked?

Love the show - it's how I try to live my life - sharing laughs and giving. Giving really is a selfish fulfillment for me. I get such a lift from it that I just want to keep repeating that high. I can almost get the same effect from watching your show. Thanks

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ree McCormick
133 days ago

I start show out each am at 6. Laughing is a great start to the day. I also downloaded your new CD on my I phone and exercise to the songs. Makes it much more enjoyable. You have so much kindness in you for others and that is precious. love you and your show. Ree (Kim) McCormick

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