Last night, I ate at a Mexican restaurant. I tried ordering in Spanish. I’m getting pretty good at it. “Una ‘Margarita!... y mucho tequila por favor!” Yo es loco! I noticed something last night that I believe is an international phenomenon. ...or I was drunk. Either way, I have to say, I believe Mexican restaurants have the best service ever. And it starts as soon as you get your table. Right when you sit down, they bring you baskets of hot fresh chips and spicy salsa. You don’t even have to ask for them. It’s like a delicious free gift. They bring them out, “With compliments from the chef.” You’d never eat three baskets of chips at home, but at a Mexican restaurant, you just pop ‘em in your mouth one after another like you just got outta Alcatraz. It’s a feeding frenzy -- until you run out of salsa! That’s when the panic starts. You look around for anyone who’ll help you. “Excuse me, we need more salsa. Our salsa dish is dry... so dry.” Have you ever noticed no one will eat the last chip? Finally, someone pokes their finger into it, breaking it into four mini-chips. Then, it’s time to order and the plates are enormous. You think you just ordered a taco, but when they bring it out, it’s a giant platter with a pile of rice and hillside of beans. And it’s all under a thick blanket of cheese. Then the waiter says, “Muy caliente!” ...which I now realize does not mean “grab the plate!”

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